Many Titles

The Return of Zoo Day: Escape from the Oregon Zoo!

(a.k.a)

Yom Kippur (or how I learned to stop worrying and love the fast)

(a.k.a)

Dog Food and the Battle of Gonzo

So, I didn't really sleep last night. Without going into too much detail, one of my cats, the bastard Gonzo, hates me, hates windows, hates rain and did I mention hates me? Those of you who know him know he's the king of asshole cats and can extrapolate from there whatever you like that may have transpired until 5:30 in the morning where he, obviously, won and I finally got a couple hours of rest. This is only important to justify that what follows may or may not make sense. But as it's been a good minute since the last update, and my sister is yelling at me about it, I promised an update.

Yesterday was Yom Kippur, so to celebrate this high holiday, I went to the Zoo again. But this time I remembered my camera. Even if the bugger hates to zoom or focus or hold a charge long, I managed to get this snap shot of Conrad the giant:

Not his most flattering or interesting side. Also finally, without an overwhelming amount of field trips or weekend holiday crowds, I was able to catch a glimpse of the baby asian elephant, which is apparently a big deal. 

And yes, though a distant cousin, he's as cute as the little elephant that befriends Mowgli in the jungle book. I just wish I was able to keep the dawn patrol song out of my head the rest of the day. That was the best brief look I could get of him before a horde of screaming children made him go hide.

So, fasting and atoning. I had done pretty well so far not eating, but was starting to feel it particularly after wandering around miles of zoo all morning. It was time to leave when the animals started looking kind of delicious and I began focusing more on how I would prepare them than their quirky regional abnormalities. When a bat made gnawing on a giant bunch of broccoli look appetizing, I knew I was done. 

Oh, but wait, what's this? large orange barricades blocking the road up to the exit? zoo employee's rapidly flowing about too and fro with scowls? Something was amiss. The best a disgruntled looking mother near me could get out of him was "something happened" and it would be about 45 minutes before the road out was accessible again. There was an alternative though, we could turn tail and head back down from where we came, and go up through the pacific northwest exhibit to an alternative exit. The pacific northwest path is a long, windy uphill climb. Much fun for the stroller pushers and those of us atoning. But, at least I finally made my escape. 

since the sun set yesterday at 1:30 in the afternoon, I figured it was time to break the fast. And I wanted to check in with Tom, so I headed over to his restaurant to break the fast. And though it was overwhelmingly delicious as always, I couldn't help feel a bit of the Jewish guilt creeping in, so with full belly, I continued to fast and atone until dinner.

Something that has to do with food here:

My camera was still in the car from the zoo, and dead so, no photo's not that any of this warrants it anyway. Breaking the fast is always a joyous occasion. Food just taste better after not having had any all day (we're ignoring my lunch). However did you know that one out of every ten steaks from omaha steaks is made of dog food? True story. But first, Corn.

I don't have much to say about corn. Joyce has lectured me on how if it's not grilled it's worthless, and while I generally tend to agree with some of the subtle points of that argument, it was 40 degrees out, and I lack charcoal. So had to cut the ear in half and boil it. Good enough, and thank god, because the steak, well, something had to go wrong sometime.

I wanted to try a more elaborate rub, and while I had ingredients listed to pick stuff up to make one, I was a little run down and was able to convince myself I should try a pre-made rub before I venture off on my own. "Rub with Love" had an inviting title so clearly it should be tasty. I dried off my defrosted 6oz filet, crusted with the rub following the suggested use on the can. 

While it seemed that the salt content of this mix was able to draw out a good amount of water, I guess not. The center was grey and wet and tasted boiled and I couldn't help but feel I lost money on this particular steak at a greyhound track in boston some years ago. The searing on the rub itself was also uneven. It was in patches wet, dry, burnt, raw powder. It was bland, overwhelming, and told me I was both directionless and ugly. We argued about politics and it refuses to vote. Some of this which may have been my fault, but I'll own it hand in hand with bad rub or maybe the odd bad piece of meat? In the end I'd have to say, it was some good corn. It immediately came to my attention I don't have corn holders, but that's fine since I've always felt silly using them.

Regrouping from the trauma of this, and digging through the freezer for the next victim, I came across 10oz strip steaks I entirely forgot were in there. We'll see if I can do better with a marinade. 

I think I need a nap. 

PS- on a positive note I am confirmed to attend the Tillamook Macaroni & Cheese Finals on the 23rd. Before those of you who care about my health start yelling at me, look at the website. Come on, I dare you to say you would not do the same.

http://www.macaroniandcheeseandcheese.com/contest